the quiet murmur of warm rain falling softly boughs heavy hang low berries swelling on the vine wild earth blushed in deep green
~kat
Moist…why is this such a taboo word? When someone utters it, people wince and cringe. Ewww!!!!
We’re having rain. Rain that can only described as moist. The air, every strand of my curling hair, my clothes, my skin all feel damp, and well…moist. The kind you feel in your bones. The kind that pools in low-lying spots on the ground. The kind of rain that breathes life into every living thing and turns the trees, shrubs and grass a deep jewel-toned shade of green. If not today when? I shall say it again with glee! How moist today is! It’s a perfectly fine word…moist…especially on days like these!
Does this make me look fat? my obsession began as a daughter stuffed into clothes that wrapped my curves too tightly I learned to hide behind dark tents of fabric, my soft skin growing pale under the weight of loathing You’re not leaving this table until you clean your plate… subliminal mandates haunt me still burning a hole in my soul that demand to be obeyed, then despised in an unhealthy cycle of too plenty and growling want against intrusive reflections that distort my perspective, rendering me less than…diminishing the beautiful light that chokes for air beneath layers of flesh, a battle waged for nearly half a century, somehow cured instantly, by the tender words of a toddler, with eyes blue like mine, nestled close, pressed against my soft belly, head near my heart, wrapped in my ample arms… I love you Gramma… and I realize, I was made for this.
~kat
I was a chubby kid. The yo-yo battle between thin and fat started in my teens. Weight has been a relentless foe for most of my life. Those rare seasons when I was able to shed weight happened only because I stopped eating…well mostly. I subsisted on hard boiled eggs, water and lettuce…and a few strawberries to treat myself, which of course is not particularly healthy or sustainable. I am older and supposedly wiser these days but that doesn’t mean I defeated those demons that haunt me still. But I am working toward being healthy. And today’s recounts a true story…the words of a toddler that saved me. Excessive dieting is not the answer to improving my health. That “I love you” murmured from the mouth of a mere babe set me on a path of embracing my curves because, you do understand, don’t you…grandmas that are soft and squishy around the middle give the best pillowy hugs…💕
Much love, peace and glimmers to you…soft squishy hugs count! 😉
I want to believe that my life matters in this anonymous, faceless world where we have grown suspicious of touch where kindness and empathy are a four-letter Word I need a hug and a good, long, ugly cry to cleanse myself of the sadness that overwhelms me in what we have become if there is a god… may I learn to be one who never wonders if there will be enough who rises at dawn with a song on her lips may I learn to be a sparrow
I am a universe a constellation of scars black holes of abuse cratered by the meteoric blows of broken men rendered powerless who felt eclipsed in my presence my heart broken and mended time and again I am a miracle of nature a patchwork of sorrow a brilliant supernova of ecstasy my body is a life-supporting orb its outer space a Milky Way of stretch marks that trace paths across the soft landscape of my core where life bloomed again and again erupting into new universes as well as a shooting star that left a trail of tears falling under the weight of gravity before disappearing into the night I am the sun, warm, radiant, fierce, and the moon, a reflection of all that is true, with the power to shift tides that erode stone set in place for centuries, reclaiming their course shards into the deep, leaving a soft, cool surface for children to sink their feet I am a mystery, I am an open book my eyes, pools of compassion, my voice dripping pearls of wisdom, I am love, I am hate, I am day, I am night some will say, oh, she is just an old woman but lean in a little closer my dears and you will see…I am a universe
~kat
It’s Mother’s Day weekend here in the US. It’s weird this year. So much of what we fought for in my youth is being eroded away by those who dream of the world before women were given rights. It wasn’t that long ago that women couldn’t own property, obtain credit, vote, or make health decisions for themselves. How quickly things slip away when we take them for granted.
And so, we celebrate mothers this weekend. If you are fortunate enough to have a loving mother who is still in your life, cherish her. Be sure to tell her that you appreciate her. And if your life is complicated…i wish you peace and healing.
Much love and glimmers to you. Today was a cool spring day. That was glimmer enough for me. I hope the sun is shining wherever you are.
I would, if I could, eat soup everyday especially now when uncertainty has my stomach twisted, tied in knots it’s comfort food, yes soup will do, it’s my go to, when I am blue, a simple broth, potatoes, beans, rice or noodles, something green, spinach, kale seasoned well, hot steaming, slurpilicious, can you tell, that soup will do when I’m distressed, better than my first instinct, clearly under great duress, to grab for something salty, sweet, too much of a good thing until I’m stuffed, uncomfortable, just ill I should have had some soup instead but worry makes me lose my head and so I cook a lot these days, soup, of course, for times like these
So it is easier for you to find all the parts/chapters of my ongoing fiction series, I created a new page that lists all the links. You can check it out HERE!
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