Tag Archives: Spirituality

Intuition’s Murmur – Magnetic Poetry Monday

breathe the sun
feel the blue
listen to shady green
and follow rosy cloud
blossoms to where
ancient rocks sing
secret songs of your
souls deep quiet

~kat

Magnetic Poetry Nature Kit


Shi Sai Sunday’s Week in ReVerse – 19 February 2017

Another week, another Sunday of looking back. The second line of this week’s Shi Sai was troubling to me when I read it back for the first time. “God is not there to listen”. What does that mean? Why am I troubled by this?

True enough, the world is a noisy, obnoxious place. I am guilty myself of zoning out; muting the cacophony that grumbles for my attention day after day, endlessly, mercilessly, ad infinitum, ad nauseam. I do it to maintain my sanity. Does god worry about maintaining sanity? I wouldn’t blame her if she did.

Just what is it that I expect from a god, a deity or a higher power? Does god exist to make my life heaven on earth, or more specifically…

…to help me pass the exam I didn’t study for?

…to land me that promotion or raise or fortune that I didn’t work for?

…to move the traffic along; to give me green lights all the way to work because I indulged my own laziness by hitting the snooze button once too often?

…to heal me or my loved ones; even thwart death, making us all immortal in a world where everything dies?

…to win the argument or war that I have stirred up in god’s name…when it is really my own selfishness, greed or self righteousness that needs defending; that needs to win?

…to make this person or that love me, appreciate me, see me?

…to fix my furnace, car, toaster or unclog my toilet?

…to fix the mess I’ve created for myself and others through my own actions?

…to make everyone just like me, and if they refuse to get in line, to make them go away…forever?

…add your own “please god” here…this is by no means an exhaustive litany…

We let ourselves off the hook too easily by repeating “god is in control” when the shit we’ve hurled at the fan comes back to slam us in the face. -kat 2017

We’d really like to be able to “let go and let god” and “surrender all” but those “come to Jesus” moments usually hit us when we are in the thick of chaos of our own making. It’s the ultimate “get out of jail free card”, absolution and immunity from accountability. An “in control” god gives us reason to praise and celebrate when the going is good, while taking personal credit for our own good judgement for having had the faith to believe. And when things go bad? We cry out, stomp our entitled feet and gnash our teeth toward god who we believe has “forsaken us”; who has stopped listening.

It’s complicated. What do I really expect from god? In all my wailing and pleading and groveling I think I’ve missed the point. And the point is not whether or not god is listening. 

The point is, am I?

Shi Sai Sunday’s Week in ReVerse – 19 February 2017

the dreary gloaming makes me weary
God is not there to listen
a stubborn squatter with a frosty bite
“Tomorrow,” he sighed
I don’t need chocolate or flowers
bits of bread and stale saltines
sight is relative
the deafening silence had an unintentional consequences
I just don’t want to be left behind
it has no value
frail shells of starved flesh
the sea is calling
a speaker’s nightmare
what’s most important to survive
nature secretly longs
bread, day old, crumbs to sustain
what I wouldn’t give to be a fly on the wall

~kat – 18 February 2017


Eden – Magnetic Poetry Monday – 12 December 2016

Eden

we are a long fall from
eden, but deep beneath the
forest, roots like tendrils
wind about in quiet on a
dark and ancient path…
listen and you can feel
her gentle murmuring

kat ~ 12 December 2016
(Magnetic Poetry Nature Kit)


And now the words come…

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It has been two days since US Elections on November 8th. Many of us are in shock. We are in mourning. We are afraid. It is real fear. There are definitely things to be concerned about if the new administration is able to follow through on its promises.

I found myself inconsolable in the wee hours of November 9th when the news came. I couldn’t sleep. I plunged into depression. I felt helpless and hopeless. I felt angry and betrayed by family and friends who boasted about voting for a monster (as I perceived him to be). It is personal for me. I stand to lose a lot as one of the targeted minorities on President Trump’s and Vice President Pence’s hit list.

Step One

November 9th was a day unlike any other. I went through the motions at work. Facebook continued to stream nasty meme’s as well as calls for kindness and civility from the very people who accepted the opposite from the most divisive, misogynistic, prejudiced candidate in recent memory. As the gloating persisted on my Facebook page, I did some housecleaning. I unfriended people I didn’t actually know personally and a few others who I realized were not really friends. Some may think it is mean to do such a thing, to unfriend someone. The truth is they probably won’t miss me. And the important thing is that it is a new beginning for me. It is Step One in regaining my power. It is Step One in remembering who I am and who I am not. I am not a victim nor am I a loser.

Step Two

Step Two requires that I face my greatest fears. It is true that the progressive, inclusive and compassionate values many of us have fought for and gained in recent years could be dashed to oblivion by the single stroke of a pen just a few months from now. New, more restrictive mandates too, could be wielded upon us. Some of us could be sent back to countries we have never lived in, but are associated with by virtue of our ethnicity. Some of us may lose access to healthcare and basic services. Some of us, those who dream and wait, longing to come here, might never be allowed to set foot on this soil because the name of their god is not the same as those in power. Some of us may lose the right to marry who we love as well as face limited access to the goods and services availed to everyone, justified by religious freedom, our natural resources risk being depleted for corporate gain. The list goes on. But the truth is, nothing has happened yet. And we are all still here, over 59,938,290 by last count. We are not powerless. We still have a stake in this country. Fear is what drove many who voted for Trump to make their unwise choice.  I must face each fear as it comes and separate reality from the boogeymonster I imagine it to be. Fear will not, cannot win.

Step Three

Step Three will be the hardest thing for me to do. It’s an ongoing step. It is one that draws upon my spirituality and faith. Step Three requires that I forgive the people who are left in my circle who voted either knowingly or in ignorance regarding the consequences of their choice and the affect it might have on me personally. From a spiritual standpoint this is where the rubber hits the road. The truth is, this is the most powerful thing I can do, because I will never know peace and healing if I don’t. These are the words that have been swirling around in my head. “Forgive them, they know not what they do.”

Now you might say, “Well, some of them did know. How can you forgive someone like that?” Well, it’s hard. And I’m not going to say I’m good at this, or that I’ll get it right every time, but I need to remember that forgiveness is not about them, or what they do. It’s about me. Forgiving doesn’t let injustice, malice and ill intent off the hook, but forgiveness empowers me to remove myself from the position of victim, to gain control of the situation and to do something about it for the sake of justice without being sucked into the emotional drama that happens when we take things personally. It seems paradoxical. It’s not personal, but it is very personal, in that I have the power to choose whether I allow it to rule my life and my response to the world around me. I can be more effective when I am free from the bonds of unforgiveness.

So this is my list, my way of coping. You may not agree. Or if you do, you may not be here yet, and that’s okay. Take time to grieve. Take time to sort this all out in your own way. If you need a shoulder or just a friendly ear, I am here with others who know that we must never cease believing in all that is good and just and true. It’s been a shocking week. Maybe we all, even those of us who have been paying attention, needed to wake up and take things up a notch.

Peace Love and Hope to you all.

kat ~ 10 November 2016


Conversations with God

We pray for peace
While arming ourselves…
We pray for mercy
While denying succor to the desperate…
We pray for healing
While shuttering access to care…
We pray for understanding
While building walls to exclude…
We pray for abundance
While hoarding stockpiles of plenty…
We pray for freedom
While expecting that others follow our demands…
We pray for unity
While excluding and setting ourselves apart…
We pray for forgiveness
While judging the lives of others…
We pray for love
While spewing hate in word and deed…
We pray for pure hearts
While our own hearts grow cold…
We pray trusting that God is listening but…
are we?

kat – 17 July 2016


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