Category Archives: Humor

April Poetry Month – A Poem a Day #9

IMG_5200

..This is Maxwell’s “Mom…MOM…wake UP MAAAMAAA…I have to go potty!!!” look…at 4 am!!!

It is day nine of National Poetry Month. I have chosen a Tercet Cascade for my poetry form today, prompted by a middle of the night wake up call…that has lapsed into early morning. No rest for my weary monkey brain.

I do love my very big puppy Maxwell…but 4 am Max??? Sheesh! Give your old mom a break! As I type he is blissfully snoring at my side. Yep…gotta love him!

At any rate, this poem won’t win any awards. Haha! A bit of whimsy, a touch of angst perhaps, but importantly, true to the prescribed form…hey, what do you expect at 4 am!

A side note…my router went offline in the middle of this, so most of the time was spent FINDING the documentation in order to reconfigure the blasted thing so I could log online to post today’s little ditty! I mention this in case you were wondering if this Cascade poem took me 3 hours to write! 🙂 I will need to revisit this poetry form one day and give it proper homage …but for now, I need coffee!

Here is a description of a basic Cascade. There are no hard fast rules regarding rhyme or meter. It involves taking a line from the first stanza, sequentially, to repeat as the last line of each additional stanza. The number of stanzas depends on the number of lines you use for the initial one. You can set it up as a three-line stanza (Tercet) or a four-line stanza (quatrain). You might even expand to a 5 line or 6 line..the sequence would be the same, looking something like this: for a Tercet – ABC-abA-cdB-efC / for a Quatrain – ABCD-abcA-defB-ghiC-jklD…you get the idea!


Potty Break

Roused awake at 4 am
for my puppy’s potty break
interrupted REM

Off to do our business then
half asleep and fuzzy brained
roused awake at 4 am!

How much longer must he take?
I am losing patience fast
for my puppy’s potty break

Those who call dogs “man’s best friend”
likely never lost a wink
Interrupted REM!

kat~9 April 2016


Let Them Eat Dirt!

Cartoonist Dave Granlund at davegranlund.com

Politicians hawk their brand, | To the media talking heads

Snake oil purveyors  | who clamor for the latest dirt

whose loyalty is sold | because dirt sells advertising

to the highest bidder… | where truth doesn’t matter…

vile bottom feeders | just don’t call yourselves journalists!

kat ~ 30 March 2016

To learn more about the Cleave poem or to give it a try yourself, click HERE to Jane Dougherty’s poetry challenge.


Friday’s Word of the Day Haiku – Vernissage

verissage

Happy Friday! Today’s Word of the Day from Dictionary.com is Vernissage. This is another one of those rare words that originally had a very different meaning.

Dictionary.com defines vernissage as a reception at a gallery for an artist whose show is about to open to the public; also called varnishing day (the day before the opening of an art exhibition traditionally reserved for the artist to varnish the paintings). It comes from the French word that literally means “a varnishing/touching up”. It entered the English language in the early 1900’s.

From Merriam-Webster

Vernissage has its roots in the old practice of setting aside a day before an exhibition’s opening for artists to varnish and put finishing touches to their paintings-a tradition that reportedly dates to at least 1809, when it was instituted by England’s Royal Academy of Arts. (One famous member of the Academy, Joseph Mallord William Turner, was notorious for making major changes to his paintings on this day.) English speakers originally referred to this day of finishing touches simply as “varnishing day,” but sometime around 1912 we also began using the French term vernissage (literally, “varnishing”). Today, however, you are more likely to encounter vino than varnish at a vernissage, which is often a gala event marking the opening of an exhibition.

I have never had an invitation to such an event, but apparently there is a certain protocol to follow, if you do. Even Miss Manners has something to say about it. I won’t bore you with her do’s and don’ts. I will just say that it is serious business to member of the Art world.

If you are honored with an invitation, behave and you might get invited again! Above all from what I’ve read, here are a few tips:

  • If you are an artist, this is not the time or place to promote your art
  • Use your indoor voice or better yet, keep your thoughts to yourself, especially if you are not fond of the artwork. Save the critique for the ride home.
  • Avoid gluttony! Making a meal of the hors d’oeuvres is not cool. Eat before or after…don’t camp out near the food table…and just because you got an invitation to the gallery, does not mean you are invited to the artist’s reception dinner afterward.)
  • Avoid drunkenness! After 3 glasses of the cheap wine or beer typically served at these events, Miss Manners advises you to leave!
  • Keep your clothes on!  Vanessa Castro in her article on the subject suggests leaving the nudity to the artist!
  • For heaven’s sake, don’t hit on anybody while you’re there! Several etiquette sites made a point of this, so it must be a problem!
  • …and one more tiny thing…do your homework before you go to avoid asking the featured artist WHO the featured artist is!!!

Gone are the days when a vernissage was a day of readying an art exhibition for the public. I daresay today’s artists need a vernissage (in the traditional sense) BEFORE their official Vernissage (in the modern application of the word)!

It’s a cool word though. I think it’s interesting to study the ways we tweak the meaning of words from their original intent into something entirely different. And…I am thankful I am not a time-traveler! Can you imagine how confusing that would be?

Here is my Haiku. Have a great weekend!

Some haughty snobs schmooze
at swanky vernissages
to laud art?…WHAT art?

kat ~ 25 March 2016


Echoes of my Neighborhood

Cubicle Sweet Cubicle!

Hello! It’s Thursday once again and time to share snapshots of my neighborhood. First of all, I can’t believe it is ONLY Thursday. This has been such a long week. And I am afraid that full moon lunacy and spring weather fever have combined to make people even crazier than normal!

I started planning my photologue last week as I was writing a poem about nesting. We all build nests wherever we happen to be. I work in a cubical maze in a office area that connects to a huge warehouse operation. In the office you can tell when someone has settled into their surroundings by the way they arrange their workplace.

So I thought I would share a glimpse of the various treasures and oddities to be found in the cubicles where I work.

Stopping in my own happy space before we enter into the belly of the beast!

cubiclesweet

This is where I live 9-10 hours a day, 5 days a week! My Cubicle Sweet Cubicle!

cubicleworld

Entering the portal now…This space houses roughly 70 cubicles. The planners opted for low walls to make people feel less claustrophobic. 🙂

I have found that there are distinct personality styles to cubicle decor. If you work in an office setting, perhaps you know a few of these characters too!

collector

The Collector fills their space with, you guessed it, collectables. It’s like a curio cabinet on a shelf. Extra bonus points if, like this example here, the Collector displays things with a particular cause or theme in mind (Breast Cancer awareness is featured here). Collections can be seasonal too. Snowmen in the winter and the like. Why do we collect things? Because it makes us happy. These folks are generally a happy bunch! 

Gardener

Ah, the Gardener! I admire those with a green thumb. I am not good at it. Real live greenery (not the synthetic, plastic variety) is as lovely in the Cubicle world as it is outside. I also believe that Cubicle gardens are quite necessary to oxygenating the stagnant, recycled air in our “air-conditioned” sealed environments. So…Bravo Cubicle Gardeners! You help us all to be healthier!

zookeeper

Like the Gardener, the Zookeeper loves to be surrounded by living things. In this case a fish tank. I have also seen frog habitats in my walks through the quad. Some people will simple set up a bubbly fountain in their space for the calming ambiance it creates. Others will install special lighting. But whatever the practice, all have life-sustaining and enhancing qualities. And fortunately for others, one can pause a moment at these special cubicles to take in the zen, without the upkeep involved. 

survivalist

Speaking of sustaining life, next on the list is the Survivalist. Everyone who works in an office knows that one place to get a chocolate fix, or a chip, cookie or mint. The Survivalists set up office pantries and are often quite willing to share in a pinch. Just remember to return the favor in kind if you happen to need to rely on the generosity of the Survivalist! They will remember if you’re just a taker.

Socialbutterfly

And every office needs our next Cubicle personality to keep the morale high. Enter the Social Butterfly. Their cubicle will change with the holidays and the seasons. And not just a lone figurine mind you, but full out garland framing, wall ornaments, trees (if the season calls for it), banners and statues. Ever mindful of the Fire Marshall rules and regs, the Social Butterfly will push their cubicle decorating to the limit, delighting us all in the process.

SportsFan

Closely related to the Social Butterfly is the Sports Fan. If it is the latest scores, stats or schedules you need, this is your person. Though it is best to navigate the Sports Fan landscape carefully. Rivalry and competition are not uncommon in these Cubes. If you are rooting for, or at least not opposing, the “right” team, there is nothing these loyal fans won’t do for you. Go Team!

devotee

….and speaking of loyalty and devotion, you will find some Cubicles inhabited by the quiet Devotees. Unlike rude and rowdy Bible Thumpers (who are forbidden by Human Resources from proselytizing), the Devotees are generally kind, generous and privately reverent in their practice. You may recognize their space by the presence of a random artifact or two, as you see here. Beautiful simplicity, calling all of us to our higher selves without saying a word.

ClockWatcher

Also not one to say much is the Clock Watcher. This model employee is here for one thing only…to do their time, leaving at the stroke of 5 pm to live life to the fullest elsewhere. You won’t find any collectibles or plants, or anything that might reveal their personality. Their cubicle is meant only for, and filled with, work…piles of work. I respect these hard workers though. No Drama!

Hoarder

If it’s drama you want, look to the Hoarder. Their cubicles are much like a curiosity shop. You can find just about anything here. This person has likely been with the company for quite some time, hence the unruly collection of stuff. But on the bright side, this is the person you would go to if you need something…whether it is information or a random staple puller thingie. Chances are good that the Hoarder will have just about any thing-a-ma-bob you might need…if they can find it!

geek

Then there is that brilliant mind whose cubicle might resemble a cave more than a desk! That person is none other than the Geek. This person is not much on socializing or conversation, but when your computer has a virus or your phone has lost it’s dial tone, this is the person you want in your corner. Get in good with a Geek and you’ll benefit from being the first to receive assistance when the system crashes. And you might even get a few great tips to make your life easier if you pay attention. When they do speak, you should listen.

minimalist

 This last one is definitely someone you need to keep an eye on, especially if they have once been fluent in one of the other personalities during their tenure. The Minimalist is either a new person who hasn’t felt comfortable enough to move in yet. They’re probably not sure they’re even going to stay. OR it is the seasoned employee who is ready to move on. Little by little the plants will move to greener pastures, the collectibles will will disappear one by one, and the only clue you will have that anyone is even using this cubicle will be the flash of the monitor in sleep mode when they’re on break. When you see the signs you can be sure the their resumes have already been updated and are making the circuit. It’s just a matter of time.

So there you have it. My Cubicle World. I’m sure you can come up with a few more Cubicle Personalities from your own experience. If we have to spend 40 plus hours in these places, we might as well make them interesting!

If you would like to see other neighborhoods from around the globe, click HERE to join in! Thanks Jacqueline for hosting this fun challenge! 🙂

 

 


Renaissance Faire Haiku

Photo Credit: Liam Desic

The Renaissance Faire!
Wenches wear leather corsets
and the blokes wear tights!

kat ~ 23 March 2016

A Three Line Tale based on the photo above. Thanks to Sonya at Only 100 Words for the prompt. Read other tales or enter your own by clicking HERE.