Category Archives: Social Issues

September 16, 2015

Rant

I have spent the better part of this week frolicking with that great pretender, Fiction. Six Word Stories, Haiku poetry, 100 Word Stories. It’s been a holiday of sorts. An opportunity to hone my writing skills…I kept telling myself. But honestly, it has been more of an escape than a detour of fancy. The world can be overwhelming sometimes. I feel everything. Your stuff…my stuff…the stuff of strangers. I am usually quite adept at regaining my center. Focusing on the moment. Breathing. Releasing.

But I have found myself distracted recently. There are a few triggers that have sent me spinning. One has to do with religious freedom and all the blah, blah, blah that has erupted. This whole brouhaha, inflated by profiteering politicians, mega-ministries and their wide-eyed, uniformed followers, is a scam. The state of our religious freedom in this country remains as intact as it ever was. You are free to pray, to worship and to practice your brand of religion. Please don’t think though, that that freedom gives you the right to impose your belief on others. It doesn’t. Just because you can’t ram your god down our throats doesn’t mean your freedom is under attack. Stop acting like selfish jerks. There I said it! It doesn’t feel particularly satisfying to say it. But it is the truth. Sometimes the truth is not pretty.

What really has me reeling is this ugly confederate flag thing. Not the obnoxious over the top bubba’s parading down the highway with huge flags flapping from the beds of their pickup trucks. I can easily dismiss their raucous behavior. It is ignorant, offensive and immature, but as a person who appreciates the rights and freedoms promised us in this great nation of ours, I support their right to wave whatever banner they wish from the confines of their own personal space and property. The public square should be off limits, though. Regardless of the reasoning for your personal allegiance to this flag, it is a historical fact that its creators were motivated by prejudice, white privilege and treason. Yes, it has its place in history. That’s where it belongs…the tattered emblem of an ill-fated band of rebels who lost the battle.

Sadly it has been resurrected again and again as the rumblings of secession has risen from the ashes. When justice prevailed in the late ’50’s and segregation in our communities and our schools was banned, southern states responded by closing schools and opening underground “white” schools bearing the names of their confederate heroes. They raised rebel flags right next to old glory, establishing a tainted legacy for future generations of students. It has reared its ugliness again recently in the wake of the surge of a new generation of rebels. Why do I even care? Why does anyone care?

I care because recently someone I know on social media, changed her profile picture to that flag. I want to tell her how offensive I find it. I want to tell her that just because she has a right to use it as her profile photo, doesn’t mean it’s the right thing to do. I want to ask her if she personally knows anyone of color and if she does, I want to ask her if they have told her how that flag makes them feel. Or maybe they’re like me. Choosing silence instead of opening up this nasty can of worms, wincing in disgust each time she posts a comment or a bible verse or a cute cat video because her picture is there…right there. Well not her picture exactly, but the photo she has chosen to represent who she is to the world. Most of all I simply want to ask her why.

I don’t ask. I already know the answer. She’s said as much in her own rants on the topic. It’s the banner of her beloved school. It’s her right to display it wherever she chooses. No one can take her flag away. It’s part of her history. And now everyone knows.

I’d have to agree. Yes, she has the right. Yes, it is her history. But she must know that it is offensive. And that is a problem for me….knowing that she can consciously choose to offend others, even if they are faceless strangers. I keep hoping she’ll get this out of her system and return her smiling face to its rightful place in her profile. But I am losing hope. And grieving.

If there is any redeeming lesson to be taken from this, it is that I have become more aware of the banners that I may be guilty of hoisting high for all to see. It has caused me to consider the silent affect that my attitude and actions may have on others. Like this rant. It’s not my best moment. Yep, sometimes the truth is not pretty. hmmmmmm.

I know I need to find my way back to center. To the magnificence of each precious moment that provides me with all I need to know about being present in this life. My highest calling is not found somewhere outside of myself and therefore has little to do with the chaos swirling all around me. It is found deep in my heart.

And my friend? The why isn’t as important to me as it was when this rant began. Sometimes I need to get the words out of my head in plain sight before I can get back on track. If you are still reading, thank you for your patience…and grace.

Part of embracing my heart’s truth means surrendering to love. Love that is patient, kind and does not take offense. I have a long way to go before I consistently get it right. We all do. And I have hope for her and me and all of us. Love never fails.

Kat ~ September 2015 (rant over…breathe in…and…)

Update…next morning 6:35 am…

Right on cue…the morning after this ugly rant of mine, this was waiting for me in my news feed,,,

I just love how the universe sends me little affirming messages, and when needed, a swift kick in the rear. And I am grateful this morning….and for this moment. 😊

3 Comments | posted in Essays, Random Thoughts and Musings, Social Issues, Spirituality

September 10, 2015

Free to be…

By Kat Myrman

“For to be free is not merely to cast off one’s chains, but to live in a way that respects and enhances the freedom of others.”

Nelson Mandela

Recently, there has been quite a bit of contentious debate regarding “Freedom” and its sibling “Rights”. To many, the unobstructed exercise of one’s perceived rights is a litmus test for assessing whether our freedoms have been denied, opening the door to varying degrees of offense, unrest and division. I may be in left field here, but I believe that just because we can, doesn’t necessarily mean that we should. At the risk of ruffling feathers, I think this whole Rights and Freedom trend has knocked us a tad off course, bruising our common humanity in the process. And honestly, it has gotten a bit out of control.

What rights after all do we lay claim to? Well, that depends on who is asking and who is being asked. And rights by their very nature go hand in hand with a plethora of perceived freedoms. There are God-given rights – Freedom of Religious Expression, civil rights – Freedom to pursue the ideals of Life, Liberty and Happiness, constitutional rights – Freedom to take advantage of all the benefits of democracy, human rights – Freedom from Discrimination, gun rights – the Freedom to Own a Firearm, individual rights – Freedom of Speech/Expression, and the list goes on and on…birth rights, natural rights, claim rights, liberty rights, individual rights, group rights, animal rights, workers’ rights, disability rights, patients’ rights, property rights, reproductive rights… rights of way and rights of passage (well, I just added those last two for a bit of comic relief). This is by no means a conclusive list!

Wikipedia gives a nice definition of the word “Rights”:

Rights are legal, social, or ethical principles of freedom or entitlement; that is, rights are the fundamental normative rules about what is allowed of people or owed to people, according to some legal system, social convention, or ethical theory… Rights are often considered fundamental to civilization, being regarded as established pillars of society and culture, and the history of social conflicts can be found in the history of each right and its development. According to the Stanford Encyclopedia of Philosophy, “rights structure the form of governments, the content of laws, and the shape of morality as it is currently perceived.”

One look at the words associated with the definition above truly sheds light on why the concept and application of this thing called “rights” has the potential to become so contentious. Words like entitlement, principles of freedom, culture, law, and morality are not light topics. If your family is anything like mine, you no doubt shudder at the idea of uttering these words at the holiday table, their use strictly forbidding in conversation! Because it is family, we willingly (well, most of the time) abide by this unspoken, unwritten rule to keep the peace.

It is when we hit the streets, in the company of strangers, of those scary “others”, that the gloves come off. Because we view rights as an entitlement, we feel that in order to affirm our level of freedom, it is necessary to defend our rights, and when possible sway as many like believers our way to support and secure our position. Misery loves company! I suppose that is human nature. But I don’t believe this is one of our finest moments as a civilization. There is a higher way…a better way I believe. One look at Nelson Mandela’s quote at the beginning of this essay, certainly gives me pause. To Mandela’s point, “(are we) living in a way that respects and enhances the freedom of others?” In a word…No.

A story by Winston and Maxwell. A lesson on how not to excercise one’s rights.

It seems Winston believes he has the right to enjoy playing with his toy without Maxwell taking it away from him. So…he sits on Maxwell’s head.

The End

Just because I have the right to express my faith, does not necessarily give me the right to deny you your rights, or to demand that you believe as I do. Based on the short list above, there are plenty of rights and freedoms to go around to make us all happy. It needn’t be an all or nothing, one-size-fits-all deal.

If you hold the belief that you should not work on Sundays, then by all means, close your chicken sandwich business on Sundays…but don’t demand that every chicken store in town close on Sunday’s as well. If your faith informs you to wear a certain head covering or to dress a certain way, you are free to do that too. Some may question your lack of style or think you are quirky or weird, but it’s not about them…it’s about you. (Which brings me to an important point. If the way you decide to live your life runs against the grain of the status quo, expect to pay the consequences for your actions. Freedom doesn’t exempt us from consequences.)

You are even free to hang offensive flags on your house, in your yard or flapping on the back of your pick-up truck. No one is asking you to remove those things from your personal space, though we might decide to walk on the other side of the street when we see you coming. Just kidding. But it is only common courtesy not to demand that you have the right to hang your flag on public property. I pay taxes to maintain that property too. It’s kinda rude to expect have your way on that one.

Oh…and one more thing, nobody wants your guns (unless you’re stark raving crazy) …so could we please agree long enough to close the loophole between our mental health system and gun registration so that those who shouldn’t have them don’t have unlimited access to them?

But…I digress…some claim we have the right to things like health care, education, equal opportunity, equal pay regardless of gender, while others claim that these are not penned in our societal compacts and therefore do not qualify as true rights. What, after all, does constitute a legitimate right? Is it only those things etched in stone or are some rights things we should consider because they are the “right” thing to do?

The point is, we don’t lose our freedoms just because someone else may wish to exercise rights and freedoms we don’t agree with or choose to enjoy. In fact, allowing you to live your life in pursuit of your own happiness (it’s called tolerance and acceptance) in no way implies that I agree with your path or your choices. It’s just silly to consider such a thought.

So I’m thinking out loud here. Can we just stop the insanity? We are most definitely free in this country. It’s unbelievable how free we are. And if we don’t like the way others are living their lives we can choose to ignore them because, of course, we should be busy enjoying our own freedoms. If we all did that we wouldn’t have time to worry about the rights of everyone around us. Sounds like great idea doesn’t it?

We can quit if our job doesn’t match our ideal of the perfect job. We can move if our neighborhood doesn’t fit our family’s needs. We are free to choose. All of us.

Rights are not rights unless they apply to everyone. I should repeat that. Rights are not rights unless they apply to everyone. So I should mention, there IS this tiny little thing called justice that I believe is important to consider. It doesn’t mean creating a new right or freedom out of thin air, but it does mean making sure everyone has a ticket to the party.

If I’m being honest with myself, there are other tenets associated with a life of freedom that require more of me. With great freedom comes great responsibility. (Back to take a look again at Mandela’s words.) Yep. Things like, kindness, generosity, mercy, charity, civility, honesty, grace, love, respect, humility. If my expression of freedom infringes on someone else’s liberties, then one of these things is surely amiss. Just because I can, doesn’t necessarily mean that I should. It is enough for me to work on perfecting those tenets in my own life. They are worth repeating…kindness, generosity, mercy, charity, civility, honesty, grace, love respect, humility. I can think of no higher calling than to exercise my right to perfect these things in my own life. Now that is true Freedom! 😊

Peace out…kat

7 Comments | posted in Humor, Random Thoughts and Musings, Social Issues, Spirituality

September 7, 2015

Inside the Skin

By Kat Myrman

“The essence of love and compassion is understanding, the ability to recognize the physical, material, and psychological suffering of others, to put ourselves “inside the skin” of the other. We “go inside” their body, feelings, and mental formations, and witness for ourselves their suffering. Shallow observation as an outsider is not enough to see their suffering. We must become one with the subject of our observation. When we are in contact with another’s suffering, a feeling of compassion is born in us. Compassion means, literally, “to suffer with.”~ Thich Nhat Hanh

I have always considered myself to be kind. Generally good. Easily forgiving and accepting of others. I am quick to join those who fight injustice with my time and treasure. I am hopeful and trusting, perhaps naively so, in the goodness of others. And I am honest. Honest to a fault some say. Which brings me to this.

Why do I feel so disconnected from the world right now?

This world of 24-hour news feeds, polarized ideals, political unrest, tragedy, conflict and greed. Well the answer might seem obvious. I have little in common with the world I just described. All that despair and suffering of others somewhere over there has little to do with me…except..except, the truth is, it does. I am them. At least this is how it is if I truly am who I say that I am. Nothing happens to others without also happening to me. And that is my dilemma, because it all feels too horrible and big for one person. And I am not sure what to do. I could pray as some suggest, but I’m not completely sure anyone is listening. Humanity has suffered the scourge of adversity since the beginning of time.

Slowly, methodically I have been shutting down, shutting the ugly world out so I don’t have to know about it…or care. I have tried turning off the cable news, filling my corner of the world with routine and beauty. I have avoided reading newspapers and online commentaries, turning to books instead. I work every day, and celebrate life in the little day to day ways that we all do…dinner with family, birthdays, weddings, births and even death, remembering the blessing of a life fully lived. What more could possibly be expected of me?

And as I ponder that question I realize that the answer lies in the truth that I am trying desperately not to care what happens somewhere, over there, to others. But the thing is, I do. Because I am them and they are me and we’re in this mess together.

How do I reconnect? It’s not up to me to change the world! I couldn’t even if I tried. Who am I after all to think I could move the needle or make a difference? Who am I indeed!

Well, I am kind. Kindness helps when the need for help presents itself. Kindness smiles. It lets the mom with grumpy kids cut in line, it reads a story, it carries someone’s groceries, it shares a sweater, it holds a door.

And I am forgiving and accepting. Forgiveness chooses not to judge when wronged. Forgiveness allows me to give others the grace to learn the lessons of their own journey without trying to hurry them along, my way. Forgiveness helps me to let go. I can accept that we may not be in the same place or believe the same thing, and that is okay. Oh and one more thing. Forgiveness means forgiving myself too. For whatever. Being good is not dependent on perfection.

To reconnect, I can do what I can where I am. Small things can have a huge impact. I don’t need to be everywhere to care, to promote justice, to work for peace. But I can inhabit those things. I can be caring in every encounter I have with those around me. I can be justice through honesty and truthfulness and I can be peace. And those things that are happening somewhere else? Well, they are part of the journey of learning to connect for those who live there. We all have a role to play.

It might not seem like a lot, but it’s a big deal. The poor, the sick, the outcasts, the refugees, war, conflict, greed…these things will always be with us. It takes courage and humility to care. To feel what others are feeling in suffering as well as joy, to put myself “inside the skin” of others. By virtue of my humanity I already have everything I need. I just need to remember who I am.

Namaste’ Fellow Humans 😊

8 Comments | posted in Digital Art & Photos, Random Thoughts and Musings, Social Issues, Spirituality